Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Men To Avoid..

From amused and bemused comes a list of 10 type of me to avoid. So I present to you a few here. The rest are at the link.

Men Who Are Prettier Than You:

It's one thing to date a sexy honey who looks like Brad Pitt, it's quite another story to be with someone who makes you feel like a manly cow just by standing next to him. You know the type, don't you? He's the "metro man" who spends more time fluffing his hair just so and takes more time doing it than you would spend painting a barn door.

Ladies, the secret to feeling pretty and feminine is to never date a man that's more beautiful than you and more delicate than you. So stop feeling like the turd that's drying out in the sun, and dump the whiny narcissist.

Men Who Think They Are Better Than You:

Have you met him? He's all about feeling superior. Nobody is good enough for him. He has a laser sharp tongue and can shred anything in sight until it lies in tatters in front of him.

This cold dead fish is unable to break into a smile for fear of splitting his face. He simply takes comfort in feeling that he is better than everybody else. After spending enough time with this guy, you will grow to despise the human race as he does, and crawl around feeling unworthy. Throw him away like you would a mold-filled potato.

Men Who Think Only With Their Sticks:

Well, as we well know, the streets to the courthouse are littered with broken marriages caused by men who think with their sticks and not their brains. They see something they want to poke and it does not matter if they have Halle Berry, Christy Brinkley or Pam Anderson, and their 2 kids, 3 dogs, and 4 fishes waiting at home. These men will do what they know they shouldn't do, go get the forbidden poke.

It does not matter that you are the hottest thing since freshly baked pie, a man like this is going to give you a few diseases and mess up publicly right when you are being voted "Happiest Couple" at the Lodge. You know he's the type to cheat as that's how you got him from his first wife. Know that you got a weasel in your arms, and throw him away before he puts you on the front pages of the daily newspaper for murder.

And I might add the two men below to this list too ;-)

From The ABC News Blogs here..

George Stephanopoulos: Can Karl help Joe?
According to a close Lieberman adviser, the President's political guru, Karl Rove, has reached out to the Lieberman camp with a message straight from the Oval Office: "The boss wants to help. Whatever we can do, we will do."

Why am I not surprised?


Keshi said...

LOL hahaha good one Jay! Some great advice for us women :)

I can say I've met all kinds except the first!

**it's quite another story to be with someone who makes you feel like a manly cow just by standing next to him.


And I really dilike Men Who Think They Are Better Than You!


Ash said...

This is SO hilarious!

Sudeep said...

tht was funny but the last pic took the honours..

Aditi said...

Yea great advice.. if only i had read that before ...
but better late then never..shall use that as my guidebook for project hangman

karmic_jay said...

@Keshi/Ash/Sudeep.. its from another link. Just copied and pasted it. :)

@Aditi. I don't think you need a guide, you already know what you want.

M (tread softly upon) said...

That's a nice link. May be they should hand it out in college for girls who are out there looking. Me, I'm already done for!

starry nights said...

Nice post Jay. lots of tips for women . I think the last one is the worst and also the ones that think they are better than you. really hilarious.thanks for sharing.

karmic_jay said...

@ m and starry thanks.. no credit to me, its copy n paste on that post. :)

Nagesh Pai said...

great combo of photo and writings!! Hilarious and cool!

opinionatedinjerzee said...

lol!!! that first pic is freaky!! gross!!!

jhantu said...

"a man like this is going to give you a few diseases and mess up publicly right when you are being voted "Happiest Couple" at the Lodge. "

Diseases definitely a big resounding NO (i get a check up on a regular basis)

The Messing up: A resounding yes.

But a good poke with a good stick is worth its weight in gold, isnt it?

Shitrint said...

hey hilarious post jay!!

the stick (dick) joke is quite well known!


all the best to aditi with the guidebook and project hangman! lol

Shama & Diya said...

Thanks for the advice, will keep it handy..hehe. But what about the other seven types or did I miss that?

karmic_jay said...

@J.. well it depends where you poke the stick and to won't mater for squat that you get tested at times.


@shama.. thks the other 7 are at the link.

MellowDrama said...

Hahah truer words were never spoken. My boss drinks alovera juice and gets upset if someone mentions his age. Muahahha. Btw where I live now, there is a profusion of "gents" beauty parlours. Definitely not dating a guy who needs more shelf space for his creams than I do!

Anonymous said...

Mr. Joementum has lost his mojo, and now the Republicans want to save this man? More proof that he's a Republican in disguise. Was there any doubt before?

The man is a danger to Democrats everywhere.

Shama & Diya said...

This article was interesting to read. I even read the types of women to avoid. HA!